Monthly Archives: July 2012

On Dealing With Personal Questions

Hello, Snarklings! Oh good heavens, is it summer already? As she has said before, the Lady of the Manners much prefers autumn. Especially October, which also happens to be the name of the Snarkling who wrote to Gothic Charm School asking for advice in dealing with personal questions:

Dearest Lady of the Manners,

I am a recovering socially anxious wreck, in so many words. I am a generally shy person, but I am trying to be better about how I speak to people I don’t know. I hoped you would have some advice to help me. See, I, at the ripe old age of 21, have just entered my first relationship ever, and it is with another lady. Naturally, people tend to have questions, which I understand. However, I am a very private person, and I get very uncomfortable when people ask me personal questions, such as how serious the relationship is, what exactly my sexual orientation is, and so forth. I tend to regress to my less polite behaviors, either one-word grunting answers, or simply telling them it is none of their damn business. I feel like there is a better way to answer questions like these, but I get so nervous and uncomfortable that I don’t think my answers through. If you have any advice at all, it would be most appreciated.

Yours,
October C

Congratulations on your relationship! The Lady of the Manners hopes that you and your lady are very happy. As to your question; while the Lady of the Manners supports you in learning to be better about talking to people you don’t know, she also suspects you think you owe those people answers. To be perfectly honest, you don’t. Continue reading

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