Category Archives: Serious Matters

This is Not the Goth Nostalgia We Asked For: Wearing All Black is NOT a Danger Signal

You would think, considering how long the goth subculture has been undead and thriving, parents and schools these days wouldn’t be concerned when their children decide to explore goth. And yet. Continue reading

Posted in General, Serious Matters | Tagged , , , | 10 Comments

Of Dealing with Parents

be supportive. Or at the very least, not react with fear and disapproval. But alas, that ideal world doesn’t exist. So what can you do when your parents react poorly to the unfurling of your spooky self? Continue reading

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Of Reclaiming Goth for Yourself

How do you reclaim Goth for yourself when it’s ended up with uncomfortable personal associations? Continue reading

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“Not Pretty Enough” to be Goth

This is going to be a somewhat multi-topic post, Snarklings; well, not multi-topic, but two facets of one larger topic. Part the First: Over on the Gothic Charm School Tumblr (yes, the Lady of the Manners is still on Tumblr, … Continue reading

Posted in Serious Matters | Tagged , , , , | 40 Comments

Of Goth Fashion for Accessibility and Chronic Health Issues

Dear Lady of Manners
My question is less one about etiquette, and more about logistics. I have my own mix of Victorian goth and punky style that I was perfectly happy with until fairly recently.

The problem is that around 3 years ago, my chronic health conditions deteriorated, and I had to start using a wheelchair full time. I can no longer stand or walk, and a large portion of my clothing is not suitable for wearing in a powered wheelchair. Continue reading

Posted in Being Fashionable, Fashion, Serious Matters | Tagged , , | 10 Comments

Of Funeral Etiquette

Do you have any advice for goths on what to wear to a funeral? I’ve never been to one, and even though most of my wardrobe is black, I don’t really know what’s ”too much” (no massive skulls and bats, nothing cut too low, but beyond that), or even how to do my make up for it. Considering how much of my style and interest in art is based around Victorian mourning clothes and the abstract concept of Death I have no idea what I’m doing. Continue reading

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Why Do Guys Like Goth Girls?

The Lady of the Manners will be honest, Snarklings: she’s been holding onto this reader question for a while, because there are many different things to address, and the Lady of the Manners felt a little overwhelmed.

I found your site interest [sic] and by mistake. Great site. Was looking up ”˜why guys like goth girls.’ Maybe you can answer that question for me real quick like. Anyway thanks for all what you do. Continue reading

Posted in Clubbing & Concerts, Serious Matters | Tagged , , , | 13 Comments

No Tolerance for White Supremacists. Ever.

For this installment of Gothic Charm School, dear Snarklings, the Lady of the Manners is going to get political. Wait, no, that’s the wrong word, because treating people with respect and not being a horrible excuse for a human isn’t, and shouldn’t be political. Continue reading

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The Never-Ending Goth Debate

It is time, Snarklings, for the Lady of the Manners to delve back into a topic that is resurrected wherever goths gather. Well, perhaps “resurrected” is the wrong term, because the Lady of the Manners is very aware that this topic has never died. Ever. This fight discussion probably lurched forward at the very instant the subculture coalesced out of the shadows: what is goth? Continue reading

Posted in Elder Goths, Serious Matters | Tagged , , | 22 Comments

You Don’t Have to Be Neurotypical

As the Lady of the Manners has mentioned before, she is frequently humbled by some of the heartfelt, heartsore letters that Snarklings have written to Gothic Charm School. And the Lady of the Manners often worries that she isn’t really able to help; she’s a well-meaning Internet Auntie, not a professional. But even with those concerns, she IS determined to help as much as she’s able, because that’s what everyone should do. Sometimes the help is focused on music, clothing, and books, and sometimes it’s focused on reassuring people that they are a goth. And sometimes, it’s a little bit of both. Continue reading

Posted in Fashion, Growing Pains, Serious Matters | Tagged , , , | 17 Comments