-
Archives
- September 2022
- May 2022
- October 2021
- July 2021
- April 2021
- January 2021
- December 2020
- November 2020
- September 2020
- July 2020
- May 2020
- April 2020
- March 2020
- January 2020
- November 2019
- October 2019
- July 2019
- June 2019
- May 2019
- April 2019
- March 2019
- February 2019
- January 2019
- December 2018
- November 2018
- October 2018
- September 2018
- August 2018
- July 2018
- June 2018
- May 2018
- March 2018
- February 2018
- December 2017
- October 2017
- July 2017
- June 2017
- March 2017
- January 2017
- December 2016
- November 2016
- September 2016
- July 2016
- June 2016
- May 2016
- March 2016
- February 2016
- January 2016
- December 2015
- November 2015
- May 2015
- February 2015
- December 2014
- November 2014
- October 2014
- September 2014
- July 2014
- June 2014
- May 2014
- March 2014
- February 2014
- January 2014
- December 2013
- October 2013
- September 2013
- June 2013
- March 2013
- February 2013
- January 2013
- November 2012
- October 2012
- September 2012
- August 2012
- July 2012
- May 2012
- April 2012
- March 2012
- February 2012
- January 2012
- December 2011
- November 2011
- October 2011
- September 2011
- August 2011
- July 2011
- June 2011
- May 2011
- April 2011
- February 2011
- January 2011
- December 2010
- November 2010
- October 2010
- September 2010
- July 2010
- June 2010
- May 2010
- April 2010
- March 2010
- February 2010
- January 2010
- December 2009
- November 2009
- October 2009
- September 2009
- August 2009
- July 2009
- June 2009
- May 2009
- April 2009
- March 2009
- February 2009
- January 2009
- December 2008
- November 2008
- October 2008
- September 2008
- August 2008
- June 2008
- April 2008
- March 2008
- January 2008
- December 2007
- November 2007
- October 2007
- September 2007
- August 2007
- July 2007
- June 2007
- April 2007
- March 2007
- February 2007
- January 2007
- November 2006
- October 2006
- September 2006
- June 2006
- April 2006
- February 2006
- January 2006
- November 2005
- October 2005
- July 2004
- June 2004
- May 2004
- April 2004
- March 2004
- February 2004
- January 2004
- June 2003
- May 2003
- April 2003
- March 2003
- February 2003
- December 2002
- November 2002
- October 2002
- September 2002
- August 2002
- July 2002
- June 2002
- May 2002
- April 2002
- March 2002
- February 2002
- January 2002
- December 2001
- November 2001
- October 2001
- September 2001
- August 2001
- July 2001
- June 2001
- May 2001
- March 2001
- February 2001
- January 2001
- December 2000
- October 2000
- September 2000
- August 2000
- July 2000
- May 2000
- April 2000
- March 2000
- February 2000
- January 2000
- December 1999
- November 1999
- October 1999
- September 1999
- August 1999
- June 1999
- May 1999
- April 1999
- March 1999
- February 1999
- January 1999
- December 1998
- November 1998
-
Meta
Category Archives: Being Mannerly
Polite Honesty, or Why Speaking Your Mind Doesn’t Always Work.
Oh dear, the Lady of the Manners hasn’t quite grasped the idea of “timely updates”, has she? The Lady of the Manners is very sorry about that, Snarklings, and promises to try and stay on top of things in the future.
Now the Lady of the Manners had thought that this lesson was going to be about volunteering to help with events, and that perhaps one should examine one’s motivations for doing so. But that lesson is going to be saved for another time, because a very interesting bit of e-mail was sent to Gothic Charm School: Continue reading
Posted in Being Mannerly, Being Social, General
Leave a comment
Fitting In and Tag-Alongs
Belonging. Fitting in. Though they won’t admit it, even the bitterest misanthrope secretly cherishes faint dreams of finding a (very, very small) group of people they feel accepted by. Some people are so eager to fit in that they don’t stop to think about whether or not the social group they’ve targeted is the right one for them; some of them want so very badly to belong that they do things that maybe they shouldn’t.
Relax, Snarklings, this isn’t the Lady of the Manners’ big after-school special on the perils of peer pressure; the Lady of the Manners hasn’t gotten that desperate for lesson topics. Continue reading
Posted in Being Mannerly, Being Social
Leave a comment
Tourist Season in GothyLand
So! This time around the Lady of the Manners is going to look at one of the perennial topics of conversation in the Goth universe, a topic that she gets a fair amount of mail about: tourists. No, not the type of tourists who go visiting other cities and historical landmarks, but people who aren’t goth (and have no interest in ever being a goth), but who go to goth clubs.
Why is this a topic of never-ending discussion in the Goth world? Well, because opinions about scene tourists are pretty sharply divided. More people in the clubs means that the clubs are making money, thus the gothic club nights will flourish, not to mention that many club-goers feel that strict dress codes and ”˜scene-only’ door policies are ever-so-slightly on the ”˜bad’ side of elitist. On the other hand, swarms of non-goths take away from the ambience and atmosphere of a club, and it’s more than a little annoying to be treated like a zoo exhibit when you’re someplace that you go to almost every week. Continue reading
Posted in Being Mannerly, Being Social, Clubbing & Concerts
Leave a comment
Being Nice To People You Don’t Like
Hello, Faithful Readers, and welcome to September’s edition of Gothic Charm School. This month, the Lady of the Manners has something very very important to talk to all of you about, something the Lady of the Manners believes is a basic idea that frequently gets ignored in the gothic communities (and in the “real world,” but she’s not going to try to fix that). “What,” you may be asking yourself, “is she harping on about this time?” Well, it’s very simple, really. Are you ready?
You should strive to be polite to people, even if you don’t like them. Continue reading
Posted in Being Mannerly
Leave a comment
Offering An Apology
Hellooooo Faithful Readers, and welcome to February’s edition of Gothic Charm School. Readers who have been visiting for ages will remember that during February, the Lady of the Manners likes to give all of you advice on romance (or the death of romance). Now, this month is going to be a little different””just a little””because a nice young man named David is asking for help in talking to a girl. A goth girl, to be precise, while he is NOT a goth. What makes this different from advice given in previous Februarys is that David doesn’t say that he’s, y’know, “interested” in this lady. No, he just wants to apologize for previous boorish behavior on his part. Mind you, the Lady of the Manners has her suspicions about what is motivating young David to try to make amends, but the Lady of the Manners will keep her suspicions to herself (for once, some of the Lady of the Manners’ friends would add). Continue reading
Posted in Being Mannerly
Leave a comment
Why Goths Must Be Polite
Hellllloooo, Faithful Readers, and welcome to your usual monthly visit to Gothic Charm School. This time around, the Lady of the Manners is going to talk to you about the reason behind her writing this column month after month. Yes, Goths and Manners; how clever of you to have guessed.
Now, the Lady of the Manners is sure there are a few of you out there in Gothy Internet Land are scratching your heads in a perplexed manner, thinking, “But she writes about this all the time. Now what is she doing?” That’s fine ”” go get a cup of coffee, then sit back down and let the Lady of the Manners chat with you. Continue reading
Posted in Being Mannerly
Leave a comment
Compliments and Catty Comments – how to take them gracefully
Greetings Faithful Readers, and welcome to September’s Gothic Charm School. Those of you who stopped by last month will remember that the Lady of the Manners talked about compliments, questions, insults, and how to deal with them. This month is about the other side of that topic ”” not the receiving of said things, but the giving.
Continue reading
Posted in Being Mannerly
Leave a comment
Comments from the Unenlightened
Greetings, Faithful Readers, and welcome to another month’s chat at Gothic Charm School. As she’s been strolling around the city, parasol held aloft, the Lady of the Manners has been having experiences that (surprise, surprise) mirror those which a lot of the Faithful Readers have been emailing her about. Therefore, this month’s column is about Compliments, Questions, and (sad to say) Insults from those who are Not Goths, and how to respond to them.
Continue reading
Posted in Being Mannerly
Leave a comment